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So you've never been to a spa before, but you're booking on a cruise on the Disney Wonder or Magic, and you're tempted by all the stories you've heard about decadent, relaxing treatments that turn you into a limp noodle. You really want to try a massage, or maybe even something more exotic, like a seaweed wrap, but your enthusiasm is dampened by your modesty. You shudder as you picture yourself exposed to all the word, trying to cover all the vital areas with a towel the size of a postage stamp, while a ham-fisted Amazon subjects you to humiliating prodding and pounding.

Okay, all you spa virgins, I'm here to give you the naked truth! As a veteran of a dozen Disney cruises (soon to be lucky 13), and several more on Royal Caribbean, I have spent plenty of time at the spa. My typical treatment bill for the length of a cruise usually equals the gross national product of a typical developing nation. This means that I am familiar firsthand with most of the treatments offered by the Vista Spa, so here is my descriptions and some tips to make spa-going a smooth and pleasurable experience for even the timidest newbie.

(Government warning: Spa treatments can be addictive and should be scheduled responsibly.)

MASSAGES: Massages are the treatment most people readily think of when they picture a spa experience. Various types are offered, from scalp and foot to full body, with a variety of techniques such as Swedish and accupressure.

One of the most commonly asked questions is: "Do I have to get completely undressed for my massage?" Basically, the degree of undress required depends on the type of massage. Obviously, you should be suspicious if you are asked to disrobe for a scalp or foot treatment. An upper body massage requires the removal of your shirt and bra, or if you wear a swimsuit, you will need to roll down the top. Full body can be done naked or with your panties if you prefer.

Disney's spa personnel are all very professional and will do their best to put you at ease. If it is your first spa treatment and you are uncomfortable, just tell them. They will be very understanding and will do their best to make it a pleasant experience.

Royal Caribbean has some male masseuses, but I have only seen females in all of our Disney cruises. If you see workers of both sexes and prefer one over the other, don't be afraid to let them know when you book your appointment. It is too late when you arrive for your treatment because they schedule each person's time and there won't be anyone available to substitute.

Expect to pay $65 and up, depending on the type and length of your massage.

SEAWEED WRAP: This treatment is pricey at over $100, but in my view it's well worth it. Your body is slathered with a warm seaweed mixture which varies, depending on what you choose. My favorite is the relaxation blend, which always puts me to sleep, but there is an invigorating muscle ease choice, as well as one to help with cellulite (haven't tried it so I can't say whether it works).

Next, you are saran-wrapped and tucked under a warm comforter while you get a scalp or foot massage. You shower off and are rewrapped with the seaweed, which gives you an opportunity to sweat out the toxins. The whole thing is topped off with a massage, and I guarantee you will feel absolutely blissful when it is done.

Obviously, you will need to undress completely for this one. You will be provided with paper panties to wear during the wraps and massage, and everything is very discreet. Your chest is bare but covered with a sheet, and during the wrap, seaweed will not be applied to it unless you want it. If you are uncomfortable, just let the attendant know so they can help you to feel at ease.

HYDROTHERAPY BATH: This is one of the less expensive treatments, and my husband swears by it. It's good for "spa virgins" because you can wear a swimsuit during the treatment. You are put into a private hydrobath that is customized for you with salt and aromatherapy oils, based on whatever you choose (for example, to relax, help your muscles, or moisturize dry skin). The jets are then programmed to give your body a "water massage."

Royal Caribbean's hydrobath on Voyager of the Seas is NOT like Disney's, as hubby sadly found out. He pronounced the RCCL version no better than our whirlpool tub at home. But in his view, the Disney version is a must-do.

THE SURIAL BATH: This is an experience that I highly recommend to all couples, especially newlyweds, and at under $70 it is one of the Wonder spa's best bargains. This is a totally private experience in which you have your own steam baths and showers, so you can remain as covered or get as naked as you want. They give you mud and aromatherapy products, leave you alone, and the rest is up to you. For my full report on this experience, see my epinion at:
http://disneycruiser.epinions.com/trvl-review-5FF9-2A233FD1-3996CFD5-prod5

THE TROPICAL RAINFOREST: This is just a large area with various aromatherapy showers, saunas, and steamrooms. Everyone wears swimwear, and it is relatively inexpensive (I think it's $16 for the day or $8 in conjunction with another treatment).

The above is just a sampler of the many options offered at the Vista Spa. You can get anything from a simple manicure, pedicure, or hair styling all the way on up to a top-to-toe combo treatment. No matter what you choose, below are some tips to help make your spa experience a memorable and enjoyable one:

1) Book your treatments early. The spa opens at 2 p.m. on the day of embarkation, so be there 15 to 20 minutes early, especially if you want to book a popular treatment. The appointments for days at sea go especially fast. They will offer you a tour of the spa, but ask to bypass this if you already know what you want to book.

2) Be aware that a gratuity of up to 20 percent is customary, depending on how much you enjoyed your treatment and how much work the treatment person did. For example, a massage is a much more labor-intensive treatment than the surial bath or hydrobath.

3) Be aware that the attendant will try to sell you products when your treatment is over. This comes as a rude surprise to many first timers who are feeling all relaxed and are suddenly presented with a sales pitch. Know that it is coming, and if you are not interested, simply repond with a polite but firm "No thanks."
The products are quite expensive, but my husband swears by the bath salts and we both use the muscle ease gel, so who knows, you might find something you like and decide to splurge.

4) As I've mentioned several times before, if you are nervous, don't let that stop you from trying a spa treatment. Either pick something "tame" or let the spa personnel know that you are inexperienced so they can help put you at ease.

I have more information on the spa treatments on my website at www.disneycruiser.com and there is an email link in case you have any questions. Enjoy!

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